Blessings

I was just reading everyone's blogs trying to catch up on what I've missed while I didn't have the internet (for a whole week...oh poor Karen) ;) And I read Julie's about how it's easy to fall into that slump of "I don't have as much as I want so, oh poor me" instead of looking around and seeing how much we have. I have been blessed to see how much we had and how much we still have. Even though we don't have our 4 bedroom house anymore, we do still have a place to live. And the way I figure it, if we get that house that we put an offer on, the rooms are a little smaller than the ones in the house we just moved from; so this way since we are all living in ONE room (I don't recommend that to anyone I like) so when we get to the other house the smaller rooms won't seem like a big deal anymore...the fenced in back yard will seem like it stretches out for MILES, and I don't have to worry about the boys getting out of my sight for a few seconds and they can have time outside to just run around and be boys. And right now, even though we are living in a hotel...not my first choice...but in any case we have a place to live, and it's not even one of those old run down places where you are afraid to let your kids be on the floor. And out of all of this I've got to say...I will miss that bath tub. This is the first hotel I have EVER been in, that the tub was so inviting that I just couldn't resist. I can't stand taking baths in hotels, it creeps me out. But this is a jetted bath tub, it's a deep one too, so even with this big pregnant belly of mine, it still doesn't stick out of the water and freeze 'cause the water covers my whole belly...oh it's nice. Even Jon tried it out last night and said "You know if we get the preacher's house" (it's another house that we are looking at if we don't get this one, we will see though) "I know what could go into that other bathroom..." so he really liked it too. So even though we are living in a hotel...at least it's a nice one. (Side Note) The Preacher's house (technically) has 3 bathrooms, but one isn't finished and it's RIGHT next to the other one (it's odd placement I thought, but whatever) so Jon was talking about knocking the wall down between the bathrooms and only having 2 bathrooms but just making one of them a big bathroom. And I still have all of my family. Which recently seems like a huge blessing despite last night. Chris was up last night wanting to play with Ethan, the only problem was it was like 11:30pm and Ethan was (obviously) already sleeping, but that didn't seem to stop him from climbing into his crib to play with him. A few days ago my cousin's good friend died in a car accident (he was 18 years old), and that poor Mother; that's the second son that she's lost in a car accident. I was just thinking that I bet that Mother would LOVE to hear her boys up playing together (even when they are supposed to be sleeping), I'll bet she would love to have the whole family "stuck" together in one room for a month or so. I'll bet she would love to be looking at houses to buy and have to make sure it's got everything that her sons would need to be comfortable living there, because that would mean that she has her sons. I know at times it just gets to the point that I want a break from the boys and I just don't know if I can wait until Jon gets home to take over some of the responsibility, but I should just be grateful that I have my hands full with these boys...and another on the way. Some people don't get the luxury of hearing their children play in the middle of the night, some people don't get to walk up and down the store isles saying "would you put that back, I'm not paying and extra 15% just because the cover has Lightning McQueen's face on it", and some people don't have a husband that will come home and take care of the kids when they've had "one of those days". So what if I don't have an oven to cook on right now...some people don't have food to put in their oven. So what if I have kids that keep me up until ridiculous hours of the night...some people don't have their children and would LOVE the chance to just sit and play with them until ridiculous hours of the night and into the morning. So what if I don't have the house that I want...I know that whether we get this house or not, I will still have a roof over my head (it just may not be THAT roof), and some people don't have that much. And so what if EVERYTHING doesn't turn out exactly how I want it to turn out, I have the faith that everything happens for a reason and if there is a reason that we are supposed to just stay here in this motel, or in a rental for a while longer, then I will just deal with it. You'd think I would have learned. What if everything had worked out JUST how I wanted it to in Pocatello? Do you know how big of a mess we would be in right now? We would be in such big trouble financially right now that I don't know if we would have ever been able to pull ourselves out. What if everything had moved along smoothly like we wanted it to, what if the owners were willing to take $20,000 off of the price of the house. We would have been thinking that we were doing great! And then when Jon got laid off I don't know what we would have done. That house would have been unsellable (is that even a word? I don't know). So I just have to trust that we are where we are for a reason and that whatever happens, I know that I still have what matters most.