I finally had my first morning of peace since Thursday. It’s been rough around this house, but we are all surviving. I think a lot of it has to do with today is our sealing anniversary (we’ve been sealed as an eternal family for 3 years today)…it still hurts, but it’s my first glimps of hope. Raegan promised me it gets easier…right now that seems so far in the future, but I hang on to that hope.
I am so grateful for a wonderful Husband who understands when, seemingly, for no reason I just burst into tears. He’s been there for me every step of this difficult process. I don’t know what I’d do without. I think I would have gone insane by now; there are days when I was certain I was going to go insane anyway. Especially Mother’s Day, I think that was the hardest day I’ve had in my entire life.
I am also VERY grateful for people not feeling the need to give me cliché advice. I am glad that the only comfort people feel the need to give me is a hug and a “I’m so sorry”…they seem to understand that that’s all I want to hear right now. There was one Sister from my ward that asked how the appointment went (we were in the store, so I was really trying to hold it together, I hate crying in public). I told her that we lost the baby. She hugged me and told me she was so sorry and asked if there was anything she could do. I told her there really wasn’t anything anyone could do. She asked if I needed her to take the kids at any time; I told her that I had had plenty of offers for that, so I know if I need someone to take the kids I can just call. She said “I will call you later in the week to see what you need.” I love our ward. Because it’s not just one of those “Sorry, do you need anything?” and inside they are hoping that you say no, or even where they mean it, but then nothing comes of it. It’s really comforting just to know that they really do mean it and that they are willing to go out of their way to make sure that My Family and I are all alright.
Thanks to everyone who’s had me and my family in their thoughts and prayers. I’ve really felt the prayers of all of you.
2 comments:
Karen, I'm so sorry. I had no idea! I think that's got to be one of the toughest things a woman would ever have to go through. I can only imagine how you're feeling right now. I wish I was closer so I could help somehow, but I guess I'll have to settle for just keeping you in my prayers and hoping that you can feel some peace at this time.
Thanks Kim. That's about all anyone can do right now. I feel bad for those that are close and still can't do anything besides keep us in their prayers because I know they want to help, but they can't. Things have been getting better around here though.
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